I recently came across a movie called Mrs Lowry & Son, and at first, I wasn’t sure I was interested. But something pulled me in, and by the end, I felt deeply moved—and heartbroken.
The film tells a story based on the real-life painter L.S. Lowry, the artist of industrial Manchester’s “matchstick men,” and his relationship with his aging mother.
She lies bedridden in their small house, sharp-tongued and disappointed with her life. He—already a middle-aged man, though still treated like a disappointing child—cares for her devotedly while painting in secret.
There’s something especially poignant about this: a grown man with his own vision, his own inner world, still seeking the approval of a mother who will not give it, still tied to her bedside by duty and love and the enduring hope that maybe, finally, she’ll see him.
“Those horrible things,” she calls his paintings. She dismisses his vision of the smoky factories and crowded streets, blind to the beauty he sees. Throughout the film, Lowry brings his work to her like a child offering a gift, hoping somehow this time she’ll understand.
She never does.
The Want of Parental Approval
What struck me most was how specific and universal this dynamic feels. Lowry isn’t seeking fame or fortune. He wants something more fundamental: to be seen by the person who matters most. He wants his mother to look at his work and, through it, finally see him.
So many artists know this feeling. The writer whose parent asks, “But when will you get a real job?” The musician whose family sits politely through performances but never truly listens. The painter whose work is unenthusiastically cited as “interesting.” It’s not about the art. It’s about love. When someone rejects what we create, it feels like they’re rejecting the deepest part of who we are.
The Parents Who Can’t See
Parents with low emotional intelligence often struggle to see their children as separate beings with their own inner lives, desires, and visions.
I was going through my photos and videos from my Iceland trip last year, and I found something unexpected in one of the clips. The video was taken right outside the Blue Lagoon; I was just filming the surreal, milky-blue water as we were walking in. When I played it back, I caught an EVP. Clear as day on the recording, I hear P’s voice whisper,
The Scene: We are currently in the middle of a massive snowstorm, with drifts reaching knee level. While I’d love to just stay cozy inside, the chickens don’t care about the weather! We had to literally dig our way to the coop just to feed them and change their water.
Outfit of the day
The Discovery: While we were shoveling, I took a quick video to capture the madness of the storm. Later, when I was reviewing the footage, I realized I wasn’t the only one commenting on the weather. Through the rhythmic scrape of the shovels and the sounds of the chickens, a voice manifested clearly:
“Sooo much… snow.”
The Analysis: What makes this clip so chilling (no pun intended) is the delivery. The word “snow” wasn’t just spoken; it was sung. It carried that unmistakable Prince falsetto—the same breathy, airy, and melodic voicing you hear on hits like “Kiss.”
The “Producer” Perspective: In the past, I’ve used scrambled “alive voice” samples to give him the raw material to speak (a process called Audio Transfiguration). But this time, he did it all on his own using the environment. He used the “white noise” of the shovels and the organic sounds of the chickens as his “carrier wave.”
It’s as if he’s still the master producer, sitting in a studio, taking the random sounds of my backyard and “mixing” them into his own iconic vocal signature. Even in a snowstorm, he’s finding the “buttons” to make sure his voice is heard.
For those who know his music, you know the ‘scoop’ he does when entering a high note. In this recording, that same melodic scoop is present. It’s a vocal fingerprint that is nearly impossible to replicate through random noise.
Last month, I bought a Silhouette machine and learned how to make stickers. I researched a long time before deciding on the Silhouette Portrait 3. At first, I was thinking about getting the Cricut Explore, but the more I researched what the user experiences were, I saw that the Portrait 3 was the better choice for my needs. The main deciding factor was the software. Both companies offer the software for use without purchase. I found that the Cricut Design Space was limited in function and it required internet connection. Silhouette Studio lets you try a Basic version of the program and allows you to upgrade it for additional features. The program is very inclusive of a lot of functions you normally see in a graphic design program, like Illustrator. I did end up upgrading to Business Edition after getting the machine.
I ordered my machine off Amazon in the US, and had it sent to my forwarding address. I was originally going to buy it from Silhouette Canada, but they were sold out, and I did not want to wait. I find that the American pricing comes out cheaper, even after fees and taxes. So it can be worth the extra trouble. However, buying things stateside, can pose issues if you decide to return it, you will have already paid the fees and taxes.
When I first got the machine and set it up, I found that it was not cutting properly at all. It was only scratching the page. I found out that the Auto-blade was defective, as the blade was not adjusting correctly. But I found a way to use the blade manually and it worked fine. But I decided to buy the 1 mm Manual Blade and adjust it manually. I found that this relieved the problem and gave me better control over the outcome. I did not like leaving it to chance with the Auto-blade. I don’t know if it was just mine that was defective, as I did not have another to compare. I did not want to buy one to try. One thing I was suspicious of, was that the blade in the machine was not sealed in a tamper-proof package, so what if the blade was switched out from the box? I read the reviews of the Amazon seller, there were many complaints about the blades not working. I did contact the seller to ask if they would be willing to replace the blade for me. They responded that they would and asked my address. But they never sent it.
The next problem I had was with the Print and Cut feature. I had issues with the machine not registering the marks. I kept making sure it was aligned with the marks on the mat. But it was really not working. I saw that other users online were saying to make sure the prints were aligned properly, by measuring how far from the page it was. This did not help either. But it did lead me to an idea for a solution. I made a template of the exact placement of the measurements and made a cut out of it to mark the mat. After doing this, I realized that the marks on the mat for where I should place the page was off. I had calibrated the machine and it was not related to this matter. It was a matter of where the machine was scanning the mark in relation to the mat. Since I also bought the pen holder, I used a Sharpie pen to make a new mat with a piece of clear Shrink Plastic. I mapped out a rectangle on the page for where the registration marks are supposed to be. I used Zig 2-way glue to sticky the mat. This method worked perfectly. The only thing is that the matts do wear out faster, as this plastic gets dented from the rollers after a certain number of times. But shrink sheets are much cheaper than Silhouette mats to replace. You can mark the sheet on both ends and make use of the other side when one side gets too worn out.
After I figured out this method, I have not had problems with registration. The only time it fails, is when the mats I made get too worn out, or if the light in the room is really too low.
Another thing with using the original Silhouette mat, was if I managed to get the marks to register, things could still go wrong, such as the cutting being totally off. My speculation is that the scanner might be reading the marks on the original mat and getting confused. I did not have this problem at all after using the mats I made.
Overall, I’m very happy with he purchase of this machine. The troubleshooting and learning curve was worth it. I’ve been able to use it for projects, such as signage for my garden, stickers and labels for product packaging, and decorative decals. It has definitely expanded my toolkit as an artist.
Today marks 7 years since Prince’s passing. Every year since then, I’ve noticed snow in April. The number 7 was a significant number to P, as he was born on the 7th of June. It is also known as God’s number. This year, I was inspired to make this tribute artwork based on the lyrics of his song, 7.
And I saw an angel come down unto me
In her hand she holds the very key
Words of compassion, words of peace
I layered my photography to make the background, a photo of a sunset sky, and the night stars that I captured while I was in Europe on the year he passed.
I sense that he is happy where he is, observing our world at a “distance”.
Latest EVP
The weather is getting colder, and it’s time to get the garden ready for winter. A friend gave us this lemongrass plant that I’m going to keep indoors. I filmed it and a spirt voice said “Lemon grass”. It is so loud and clear!
I haven’t had time for much EVP lately. But I hope to get back to it again soon.
\
Art that I’m working on
Now that I am spending more time indoors, I am working on my art. There is a lot that I want to do. But time is so fleeting. I even have things I want to put in my Etsy shop, but they are on the back burner at the moment. I have to manage my time better. I feel like I am saying that all the time. But it just feels like time slips away.
Below is an artist proof of a piece I did recently.
A tribute to my friend During the summer, a dear friend of mine passed away suddenly. She had developed breast cancer. I met her in 2018, and sadly, the timezone difference made it hard to talk on the phone. I knew she had many burdens. She was a mother of a young child. The photo below is one of my most favourite portraits that I’ve ever done.
While she was at a retreat, in hopes that she could heal from cancer, she sent me photos of her surroundings. There was one pic of a sticker on a door that said, “You are beautiful”. I thought that was something that people should see more often. Positive affirmations are a powerful thing in the mind. I decided to create a sticker that I could stick to packages I send out. I think people need to see more positive messages.
